Try to think of the rejection as an opportunity to grow as a person and figure out what works for you. Take some time to think about what you might’ve done differently to turn that rejection into an acceptance. This will help you learn from your mistakes and make changes for the future.
The guy will need to process his feelings too. If you want to be friends again after he rejects you, you’ll need to give him a bit of time and space to figure out what he thinks about it too. This will help eliminate any potential awkwardness. Of course, the length of time that you need to wait will vary from situation to situation. But a good rule of thumb is to wait at least two weeks, or until you start feeling more comfortable with the idea of talking to him again.
Don’t ever change yourself for anyone. Your uniqueness is what draws people to you.
Running through alternative scenarios in your mind over and over will only prolong your agony. Just accept that it happened and try to avoid thinking about it too much. Tell your friends that you don’t want to rehash the rejection and that you’d like their support in not talking about it. If you find yourself obsessing over the situation, try distracting yourself by doing something else. Call a friend to meet up or start watching a movie. Try rereading a book you love or going for a walk outside.
Don’t ice him out and ignore him so you can pretend like what happened didn’t hurt you. Instead, make efforts to continue the friendship and get to know him better. If you want to reach out to him to try to maintain the friendship (or start one in the first place), you could try to talk to him about it. Tell him that you value him as a friend and you don’t want to lose the friendship. Invite him to hang out with you casually — like going to a movie or hanging out with a group of mutual friends.
You can tell when he starts being more comfortable by how he acts – if he starts treating you like he did before the rejection, then it is close to being back to normal. Some signs that it may be the right time to start trying to interact with him again include increased eye contact between the two of you, noticeably fewer awkward encounters, or if your mutual friends tell you that they think he will be receptive to it.
Have a party at your house and invite him. Or go with your friends to the movies, even when you know he’ll be there. Show him that you are a fun person to be around.
Try asking questions like, “How did you do on the Math test?” or “Did your sister come home to visit this weekend?” or “What did you do this weekend?” Really, just ask anything to get him talking. If you are friends with the guy or became friends with him, avoid bringing up the rejection. It only makes things a bit uncomfortable and you might regret it. It just makes him feel bad that he had to reject you, for whatever reason. And it may seem like you cannot let go of the past.
Treat him like any other person you would normally talk to.
Start by liking a photo he posted. Don’t leave a comment, just like the photo. Wait a few days and then leave a light-hearted comment on something he posted. Nothing too personal – just a joke or a funny reference. During this period, be sure to continue posting a few things on your own accounts to give him an opportunity to return the gesture. Don’t go crazy with the posts, but post enough that it’s clear you’re still a fun person living your life, not just someone who is moping around after the rejection.
Try texting something like, “Hey. Did you ever get around to watching that movie I recommended?” Or maybe, “Hey. See you at the party this weekend?” Keep it light and casual. You can build from there.
