For example, “I’m Annie, your granddaughter. Your daughter Sue is my mom,” is better than just “I’m Annie. ”[2] X Trustworthy Source Alzheimer’s Association Nonprofit organizaton focused on supporting those affected by Alzheimer’s and promoting research on the disease Go to source
Saying “We’re going to the grocery store to pick up a few things, then we’re going to the park across the street from the school, then we’ll see a movie at the mall” might be confusing. You might change it to “First we are going to the grocery store. ” Give them a moment to process before proceeding. “Then we will go to the park. ” Pause again. “Then we’ll go to the movie theater and see a movie. ”
If your loved one is not understanding what you mean when you say “Wash your hands,” you can pantomime rubbing your hands together, or even take go into the bathroom and demonstrate.
Going along with their stories, even if you know they are false, can help keep the peace. Do not feel like you need to correct them. [6] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source If you find yourself getting frustrated and ready to argue, take a break. Give yourself a timeout.
Depending on the intensity of the dementia, your loved one may not be capable of making many decisions, but be sure to give the opportunity as often as you can. Even small choices like, “Which shirt do you want to wear today? The blue one or the white one?” can help improve quality of life.
Pay attention to what is being said and help the person get back on track, and do not make a big deal out of it. Say in a lighthearted tone of voice, “Oh, you were just telling me about the dog you had growing up! Can you tell me more?”
For example, if your grandma asks “Where is my husband?” and you know he is deceased, you could say “Where do you think he is?” If she says he is dead, then agree. If she says “I bet he’s at the store,” then try saying “Yes, he’s probably out shopping. "
Try changing the subject to make them stop asking the question. For example, you might say something like, “Do you remember how we went to the choir concert? Did you like the concert?” You will often find that their long-term memories are still quite good, so changing the subject to a well-remembered past event may work to end the line of questioning. You might ask, for example, “Where were you the day Kennedy was shot?”
Believing they have been robbed is a common delusion. Provide reassurance that they and their possessions are safe, perhaps taking a few minutes to help locate the “stolen” object. Consider having your loved one seen by a primary care physician or a psychiatrist to find a medication that will alleviate anxiety.
Don’t pick up the phone every single time. Consider putting your phone on silent at night. Listen to your loved one’s concerns and give assurance that you will help take care of the problem. If it is not an emergency, you do not need to drop everything to attend to the person all the time. Speak to the nurse at the nursing home if you are concerned there is a real problem that needs to be addressed.
If they ask where a deceased person is, ask “Where do you think they could be?” The person may say “In the cemetery,” or they may say something like “Maybe they went to the store. " Whatever they say, respond with “Yes, that’s probably right. " It’s better not to make them relive the pain of losing that person.
These groups can give you suggestions for ways to communicate with your loved one, as well as offer you comfort and reassurance. They are a great way to avoid feeling isolated, as many caregivers frequently do.
Come over and spend time with the person Help cook meals Take the person out to do something fun (from walking in the park to painting at the senior center)
In-home care. You can have someone stay with your loved one at home while you get out of the house for a while. Senior day center. You can drop your loved one off (or, in some cases, have them picked up) for a few hours of activities and socializing. Residential facility. This can be an option if you need to have your loved one taken care of overnight, or for a few days if you need to go out of town.