They’re bored and they want to see something interesting happen They want your attention They feel unheard and are lashing out They have an unmet need unrelated to you (e. g. being hungry or tired) and are acting out

Do you disrespect them or cross a boundary? Do you steamroll over what they have to say instead of listening? Did you pick a fight?

They don’t necessarily mean the things that they are saying. And these things are probably untrue. Part of learning to be strong is learning not to let other people’s immaturity drag you down. Their attitude is not your problem.

Most often, big outbursts happen because your sibling doesn’t know how to cope with their big emotions. All you can do is wait it out and then forgive them for being imperfect.

If you feel like crying, say “goodbye” and walk away. Refuse to retaliate. This rewards the behavior by giving them attention (even if it’s negative attention).

“I don’t like to hang out with people who call me names, but if you try asking nicely, I might give you a different answer. " “I don’t like listening to rude language. But you can try again politely. " “If you want my attention, you can try calling me by my name. "

“I’m not okay with you talking to me like that. " “If you do that again, I’m leaving. " “I’m not interested in putting up with name-calling. Goodbye. " “I’m not going to tolerate your insults anymore. Goodbye. ”

Confide in a loved one Write in a journal Listen to moody music Take out your frustrations in a harmless manner (exercising, ripping paper from the recycling bin, smashing ice cubes in a bathtub)

“Mom, I’m tired of putting up with Meg’s name-calling. I’ve tried ignoring her and leaving the room, but she continues. Can you help me?” “When I ask Tony to clean up his messes in our room, he’s started turning verbally aggressive. Today he swore at me when I asked him to clear his games off the floor. What do I do?” “I’ve noticed that Archie has started screaming at me a lot lately whenever I do something he doesn’t like. I don’t know why he gets so angry. "

Don’t call them names or make fun of them. (Friendly teasing is okay, but avoid teasing about their insecurities and apologize if you hurt their feelings. )

Of course, that doesn’t mean being a doormat. It’s okay to leave or get an adult if your sibling is mistreating you.